I don’t Know what you would consider where I am. It’s anywhere but here really. It’s strange when people talk about their past with such fondness. All I have of the past is memories of harsher times. Shouts in the distance that ring in my eternity. It’s like something short circuited that just wont be fixed.

I walked away from my brothers so they wouldn’t see my “weakness”. Little did I know we would all go through the same. These men, my brothers, were not given family, but family all the same. I would die for each of them in a million ways. The one time each of them needed me I wasn’t there.

Too wrapped up in my own pain to see that they needed me. Too wrapped up in where I belong to see that they didn’t fit either. The funny thing about going to war nobody ever tells you, even if you make it home, part of you still dies.

Even if you strive to be the person you once were, something has changed. Your mind will scream at you while your body moves through life. Happiness will be a memory of happier times. Your brothers will always be your brothers.

You’ll always be a hero. You’ll never live up to your own expectations. Your life has forever changed, and you’ll never be the same.

By Jacob Young

This one was submitted by Jacob Young. Former A/C BTRY 5-113 Field Artillery, From 2002-2008 and the 1452nd NCNG from 2010-2013. Jacob deployed from 2005-06 with A 5-113 during OIF and was on the gun truck platoon with me during that deployment.